Friday, December 23, 2005
(c) Edward Vincent and Connie Chin 2005
R's rise to power and his learning that X and D are still alive. He is cocky, thinks he can take them both. Chuck Norris smacks some sense into him.
Needs to end with X and D's raid on the dojo.
Showdown.
X and D must be split up by the end. X fires D.
Climax -- X insists on fighting R unassisted.
X fires D.
Recap and D's walk into sunset.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10
X = MAIN CHARACTER
R = BAD GUY - knows X from somewhere.
D = SAMURAI
A CO-ED XD Production.
INT. BART TRAIN - MORNING
We meet X reading a PAPER, carrying a heavy looking BAG,
sitting at the back end of a train as it stops at a station.
Various people get on, including a guy named R and HIS
ENTOURAGE. X and R do not notice each other as the posse sit
down. The train continues on its track.
X looks up from his paper, notices R and company and tenses
up immediately.
R covertly picks the pocket of a passenger and X notices. He
drops his newspaper on the floor. The train operator says
something indistinguishable on the intercom. He stands up
and heads towards the doorway on the opposite end of the
train, however he is clumsy and steps on R's foot on the way.
R
Mother fucka!
(cue 6. 1st samurai)
All of his posse start getting all excited -- X makes a run
for it. R gets up to follow as X goes to the next car of the
train. Running from one end of the train to the other, X
always half a car ahead but running into OBSTACLES on the
way, like a crowded train or A WOMAN with a STROLLER.
X gets to the front of the first car -- a dead end. Luckily
the train is pulling into a station and R is caught on the
stroller. X waves goodbye as the doors open and runs toward
the escalator.
EXT. BART PLATFORM
X exits the train at a run and goes down the escalator. The
train doors are closing but R's arm sticks through the doors
just before they close and the doors open, and he pursues X.
EXT. STREET - UNDER TRAIN TRACKS
X keeps running for a whole block, and stops to look behind
him (cue D-11 Fear / Panic). He can see R talking to his
posse, telling them to split up -- two the opposite
direction, four plus R headed towards X.
(cue wolf and cub music)
He sits down on A BENCH near the trail, looking defeated. He
knows he can't out run the gang.
X
(To himself)
I can't out run them...Maybe I can
beat them.
He looks around for a blunt object to defend himself with.
He see's a stick shaped object on the ground...He picks it up
and the sheath of what is A SWORD falls off, it was a sword
designed to look like a walking stick. Awestruck, he picks
it up, sheathes it, and as he does a goon is about to strike
him on the head with a BEER BOTTLE. X dodges and begins to
panic and cries out in a rage filled battlecry and whacks the
goon on the head with his weapon still sheathed.
Breathing heavily he tries to and sit down on the bench. As
he is about to sit a woman with a stroller (the same stroller
that was an obstacle on the train) passes by. Before the
stroller passes, X is alone on the bench, but after the
stroller strolls by A SAMURAI is revealed and is looking in
the direction of X.
D
I believe that is mine.
X
Oh...Sorry.
(Cue the stroll)
D takes the sword. X realizes that D is blind.
R and his gang arrive on the block.(cue 4. Loading zone)
R
(to X)
I thought I recognized you. You're
the bastard that--
D
You have a sharp tongue. Perhaps I
should trim it for you.
R
Who the fuck are you? Stay out of
this its not your business.
(to his fellows)
Get rid of this guy.
R's friends start to advance on the blind man. Some start
taking out knives and other petty weapons.
D stands up, removes his sword, cuts down all three of the
goons and sheaths his sword in one move. X and R yell in
shock.
X
You just killed three people!
D just sits there quietly. X is in total panic and cowering.
R
What the fuck do you think you are.
a fucking samurai? Who the fuck
wears that?! You are ridiculous
looking. Like it's fucking
Christmas.
D just sits there quietly, looking at him.
R pulls out A GUN and fires, D blocks each bullet with his
sword. When R runs out of bullets D points his sword at him
and sheaths it.
D
Do you want to go to hell over a
smudge on a shoe?
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF PART 1
PART 2
FADE IN:
EXT. STREET - MOMENTS LATER
R pulls out a gun and fires, D blocks each bullet with his
sword. When R runs out of bullets D points his sword at him
and sheaths it.
X
(seething at R)
Give me your sword,
(stuttering)
he tried to kill you because of me
and...I want to finish this guy.
R's other friends run up.
R
'Bout fucking time! Let's get out
of here.
(to X)
You better watch yourself. I'm
going to find out who you are and
get you when your freaky samurai
buddy isn't around.
R and his companions run away.
X
Ugh...
X is stressed out over recent events. He looks at the BODIES
on the ground. Then looks around -- no one saw, but someone
probably heard the gunshots.
X (CONT'D)
(to D)
Why did you have to kill those
guys?
D
The question is why were you about
to kill them.
X
What?
D
Attacking in blind rage is foolish
and irresponsible. I did what was
necessary to defend your honor.
X
Whatever...Thanks for helping me
though...We should probably get out
of here before someone finds these
bodies...I really need something...
X walks off in the direction of the nearest COFFEE BAR. D
keeps standing there and looks at X as he walks away.
X comes back, grabs D's wrist and drags him along.
INT. STARBUCKS - LATER
(Cue the stroll)
X is sitting in Starbucks drinking a BIG CUP OF COFFEE and D
is just sitting there kind of tilting his head about. MUZAK
is playing quietly.
D
Where is the music coming from?
X
The ceiling.
D
Oh...Strange.
X
Look, don't you think cutting a
bunch of retarded henchmen in half
was a bit of an over-reaction?
D
Protecting you, my lord.
X
(Aghast)
Excuse me? Well whatever. Why are
you called D? That isn't a
Japanese name.
D
I thought it would be easier for
you to remember.
X
Easier to remember than what?
D
Masamichi Daikikuyoshi. My
comrades call me Daikiku for short.
X
Da-kakuki...I'm just going to call
you D.
D
What ever is to your liking.
X gestures to shake his hand. D does nothing.
X
Oh uh...right.
X picks up D's hand and puts it in his in a hand shake
motion. After shaking it, he lets go and D's hand drops like
a dead weight.
X (CONT'D)
(while nodding)
Good enough.
X is still scared of the samurai.
D
Listen, let me tell you a story.
EXT. ANCIENT JAPAN - AFTERNOON (FLASHBACK)
There is a SMALL TEMPLE at the top of a hill, a younger D is
walking up the many steps toward the hill. An OLD LONE MONK
is sweeping.
D (V.O.)
A huge, rough samurai once went to
see a little monk, hoping to
acquire the secrets of the
universe.
D (THE YOUNGER VERSION)
(in a voice accustomed to
instant obedience)
Monk, teach me about heaven and
hell.
The little monk looked up at the mighty warrior in silence.
MONK (AFTER A MOMENT)
(with utter disdain)
Teach YOU about heaven and hell? I
couldn't teach you about anything.
You're dirty. You smell. Your blade
is rusty. You're a disgrace, an
embarrassment to the samurai class.
Get out of my sight at once. I
can't stand you!
The younger D is furious. He begins to shake all over from
the anger that raced through him. A red flush spread over his
face; he was speechless with rage. Quickly, menacingly, he
pulled out his sword and raised it above his head, preparing
to slay the monk.
MONK
(quietly)
That's hell.
D (V.O.)
The samurai was overwhelmed.
Stunned. The compassion and
surrender of this little man who
had offered his life to give this
teaching about hell! He slowly
lowered his sword, filled with
gratitude, and for reasons he could
not explain his heart became
suddenly peaceful.
MONK
(softly)
And that's heaven
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF PART 2
TITLE OVER:
It is bad when one thing becomes
two.
- Yamamoto Tsunetomo's Hagakure
PART 3
FADE IN:
INT. STARBUCKS - MOMENTS LATER
X slurps the end of his drink.
X
What the hell does that mean?
D does not explain.
X (CONT'D)
Well I'm done...I guess we'll go
home?
They leave.
Meanwhile...
INT. LOCAL DOJO - AFTERNOON
The best swordsman in America, CHUCK NORRIS, just happens to
have a school in the area. And it just so happens that R
knows him pretty well.
R
This guy killed three of my men in
one move, man!
CHUCK NORRIS
Violence is my last option.
R
Well it was this guy's first
option!
CHUCK NORRIS
This man has no honor. I will help
you. I will help you only on the
condition that you finish this in
an honorable way. No petty weapons
or gunfire.
(with an air of wisdom)
Men are like steel. When they lose
their temper, they lose their
worth.
They walk to where R's other goons are.
R
What I need you to do is take out
the samurai so I can deal with X.
CHUCK NORRIS
This should not be too challenging.
EXT. X'S HOUSE (FRONT) - AFTERNOON
X is leading D toward a domesticated looking HOUSE in a not
so great part of town. There is a DOG barking inside.
X
Well here it is, home sweet home.
D makes a hmm type sound.
X (CONT'D)
Before we go in, I'd like to know
what is going to happen next.
D
You must confront your opponent.
X
Well, you'll defend me, right?
D
To the best of my ability.
X
What the fuck does that mean, 'best
of your ability'? This guy is
going to kill me if I don't have
help.
D
That is why I must teach you to
defend your honor.
X isn't sure what that means, but he leads D toward his
house.
INT. X'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM) - MOMENTS LATER
X and D enter the house. A SHEDDING DOG comes running
towards them. D tenses up noticeably and backs up into a
corner.
X
(while petting the dog)
This is my dog Indiana. Say hi,
Indiana!
The dog barks. D whimpers in the corner a little. X notices
D's fear.
X (CONT'D)
What's a matter? Don't worry, this
dog wont bite. In fact it's more
tame than a baby kitten.
D does not explain, but stays in the corner.
X (CONT'D)
Well come on, Indy. We'll put you
in the back. If you see a crazy
looking guy, just tell him you're
with me.
X takes the dog out of the house and D gets it together.
INT. LOCAL DOJO - EVENING
R's henchmen are sparing with BOKKEN, learning the art of
combat and fencing. R is being trained by CHUCK NORRIS
himself.
CHUCK NORRIS
(in between blows of
wooden sword)
I suspect that the boy will have
had some training.
(R is unsuccessful in
blocking one of CHUCK
NORRIS' attacks)
--No that's not good enough!-- If
you expect to beat this kid you
have to do better than that. I
will not defeat the samurai if you
do not satisfy me.
R attacks with a particularly clever lunge, CHUCK NORRIS sees
it coming and blocks it easily.
CHUCK NORRIS (CONT'D)
Try any more fancy stuff like that
and I'll break your nose.
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF PART 3
TITLE OVER:
The Way of the Samurai is found in
death. Meditation on inevitable
death should be performed daily.
Every day when one's body and mind
are at peace, one should meditate
upon being ripped apart by arrows,
rifles, spears and swords, being
carried away by surging waves,
being thrown into the midst of a
great fire, being struck by
lightning, being shaken to death by
a great earthquake, falling from
thousand-foot cliffs, dying of
disease or committing seppuku at
the death of one's master. And
every day without fail one should
consider himself as dead.
- Yamamoto Tsunetomo's Hagakure
PART 4
FADE IN:
INT. X'S HOUSE (GUEST ROOM) - NIGHT
There is a dog barking outside of a door. Inside the door D
lays on a BED wide awake.
X is in the living room watching LATE NIGHT WITH CONAN
O'BRIEN with his CRAZY UNCLE DAVE.
D would like to go tell X off for staying up late watching a
comedy show when he should be training, but doesn't know how
to get past the dog.
Suddenly, D grabs his sword.
INT. X'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM)
X and his CRAZY UNCLE DAVE watch the TV. CRAZY UNCLE DAVE
mutters agreements or disagreements with Conan's monologue.
Suddenly a MOLOTOV COCKTAIL comes in through the window,
exploding near a FISH TANK.
Now on alert, X and CRAZY UNCLE DAVE start giving each other
WTF looks. INDIANA THE DOG starts barking like crazy.
Three of R's goons come bursting through the door with cheap
but sharp KATANAS and HAND GUNS. They see Indiana barking at
them and shoot it in the head.
X and CRAZY UNCLE DAVE try to make a run for it, but the
goons point their guns at them and fire.
CRAZY UNCLE DAVE is shot dead in the back of the head as well
as several points in the back. X is shot several times as
well and falls to the floor.
All this happens so fast that it happens before D can burst
through the GUEST ROOM DOOR into the living room, brandishing
his sword. The goons fire their guns at him, but they spent
too many bullets on the earlier victims, so they don't fire
off that many. Blocking those few bullets are a piece of
cake for D and his sword. R's goons then switch to their
katanas, but D gives them one look and they don't advance.
D looks down and notices X on the floor full of holes.
Immediately he sits down on his knees, opens his kimono,
takes out his sword and cuts through his belly. Grunting
slightly, he falls down on his side.
R's goons observe this, laugh, and leave as the house burns
down.
INT. LOCAL DOJO - LATER
R is standing next to a water cooler for a break after a
sparing session.
R's goons return to the dojo and talk with him. They tell
him what they did, expecting praise.
R
(laughing insanely)
So what have I been training for
all this time?
He can't have been training for more than a day.
R (CONT'D)
(after a moment)
Well I've got to use it on someone!
R raises his wooden sword he'd been practicing with and
begins to beat the closest minion, then the other two. The
sword moves are actually very good for someone who has been
training as long as he has, and it's clear there's skill
there.
CHUCK NORRIS runs up behind him and whacks him on the head
with his sword.
CHUCK NORRIS
You couldn't even block that! You
are not ready! You must learn
control.
You need to control your anger, it
makes no sense to punish your
companions.
(to minions)
That being said, you two have truly
screwed up. You deserve the
treatment you've received. All of
our plans are ruined now.
R
I still want to continue the
training.
CHUCK NORRIS
Of course you do.
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF PART 4
PART 5
FADE IN:
INT. X'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM) - NIGHT
(cue D-10 Hastiness and fade into 3. judgment on when it
finishes)
The walls of the house are now aflame. Smoke is filling the
house. In one area of the room, blood is everywhere. . .
Crazy Uncle Dave is dead. His body lay next to the couch.
X is down, but not out. The shots didn't hit any vital
organs, and he wakes up.
X takes in the surrounding environment, he sees Crazy Uncle
Dave dead on the ground. He checks his pulse, no luck. He
then sees D on the floor with his sword in his chest.
X
Why!
X pulls himself over to where D is. He checks his pulse,
there's still a chance he can make it! He then grabs him by
the collar and pulls him along the floor towards the front
door and out.
EXT. X'S HOUSE (FRONT) - NIGHT
X fumbles with his pocket and finds a CELL PHONE. He calls
someone close by who will take him and his friend to a
hospital.
INT. HOSPITAL - LATER
They check into the hospital under false names and are taken
into surgery. . .
(cue 5. mystline)
FADE OUT.
TITLE OVER:
Two weeks later
INT. HOSPITAL BEDROOM - NIGHT
X lay on a bed next to D, D is heavily bandaged, but X looks
fully recovered.
(cue kodama [interlude])
X
Why did you try to kill yourself?
D
I thought you were dead.
X
That's no reason for you to die
too.
D
You wouldn't understand.
X
I don't care. That's not
acceptable. What am I to you
anyway?
D
I'm your retainer.
X
Well if you're my retainer that
means you have to do what I say,
right?
D
...Yes.
X
Good. Then I am going to give you
an order right now. No matter what
happens to me. No matter what
happens to you. You must not end
your life by your own hand. I
don't care what the circumstances,
I don't care about your honor, I
don't care about my honor. You
must not ever kill yourself.
D (MAYBE V.O.?)
(to himself, X does not
hear)
I suppose I am already dead.
X
Do you understand me?
D does not answer.
X
(angry)
Answer me, do you understand?
D
Yes.
X
Good. So what are we going to do
now?
D
Now you must learn to defend
yourself.
X
Train myse-
D
I will train you personally. Those
men who attacked you held swords,
this can only mean that they are
training themselves.
In the event that I can not protect
you, you must be able to protect
yourself.
X
How are you supposed to train me?
You can't even see.
D does not answer.
X (CONT'D)
Well whatever...What makes you
think they will stand a chance
against you?
D
Even if they do not posses any
skill, many of them will be hard to
defend against by myself. I also
suspect they aren't entirely
helpless.
X
What is that supposed to mean?
D does not answer.
X (CONT'D)
Well, then...what's the procedure?
D
We will go to seclusion for three
months. By then, you should be
able to defend yourself from
anybody.
X
Even you?
D does not answer.
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF PART 5
PART 6
FADE IN:
EXT. WOODED AREA - MAGIC HOUR
X and D are in a forest, sitting. X looks bored.
X
Not that it isn't pretty here, but,
what are we doing here?
D does not say anything, but instead walks behind X and ties
a BLINDFOLD around his student/retainer's head as he puts a
BOKKEN in his hand.
(cue Gentleman)
D
Now begins your training. You will
learn the way I did. I have never
been able to see, so neither shall
you.
X
But--
D
Don't argue with me! I mean you no
disrespect but this has to be done
my way. You can do it, and will be
ready for anything when we finish.
And with that he steps away.
X
You know, I've done a little
fencing in my past--
D throws a rock at his head.
X (CONT'D)
(angry)
What did you do that for?
While circling around X, D throws another rock at his back.
X (CONT'D)
(more angry)
Hey stop that!
X tries to take off his blindfold.
D
(after throwing a rock at
his hand to stop him)
Leave it on.
X
What are you talking about?
D continues to circle and throws another rock.
TITLE OVER:
Two hours later
It is now starting to get dark and D is still circling,
sometimes switching direction, and throwing rocks, there is a
pile of rocks around X now, and there are many bruises. But
he is starting to catch on. You see him swinging the sword
in the general direction of the stone, but still missing
them. D does not yell at X the way Chuck Norris does, in
fact he makes no noise at all.
He throws a rock and it flies toward X. Things go into slow
motion. You can see X's determination on his face. He turns
around and blocks the stone with the wooden sword. D's
training is really doing something to his confidence.
D
(proud but trying not to
show it)
That is the beginning.
CUT TO:
(cue Cakes? Maybe Montage?)
TRAINING MONTAGE - WE JUXTAPOSE
X practicing sword moves in the forest.
R practicing sword moves in the Dojo.
X cutting down tall grass in a field.
R cutting bamboo sticks that have been stood up in the dojo.
X meditating on a mossy rock.
R punching a punching bag.
X and D sparing on a cliff. D offering words of
encouragement.
R and CHUCK NORRIS sparing in a boxing ring. Chuck yelling
when R makes a mistake.
SPLIT SCREEN:
X and R doing the same sword moves while moving towards the
camera. X is still in forest, R is still in dojo. X looks
calm and focused. R looks angry and sweaty. Both look
deadly. (Realistically, neither of them are a match for
either D or Chuck Norris, but they're matched fairly even for
each other.)
FADE TO OUT.
END MONTAGE.
TITLE OVER:
Three months later.
EXT. WOODED AREA - NIGHT
D and X are sharing a quiet moment sitting around a fire.
X now sits with a sheathed sword at his side. It doesn't
matter where he got it.
D
While far from a master, you still
should have the ability to defend
your honor should I be
incapacitated.
X no longer asks questions.
D (CONT'D)
Now we must figure out a way to
keep you hidden--
X
(cutting him off)
Why should we hide? Why don't we
meet them face on. Don't give them
another chance to take us by
surprise.
D has a smile on his face.
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF PART 6
text in this color is a note from ed, not part of the script...yet.
The difference between X and R's training is that Chuck Norris is really good at the tehnical part of things. So R knows the technique, but not the art. X gets taught the art of combat.
PART 7
FADE IN:
R's rise to power and his learning that X and D are still alive. He is cocky, thinks he can take them both. Chuck Norris smacks some sense into him.
END OF PART 7
Needs to end with X and D's raid on the dojo.
PART 8
FADE IN:
Showdown.
END OF PART 8
X and D must be split up by the end. X fires D.
TITLE OVER:
Nothing was solved,
but nothing mattered.
PART 9
Climax -- X insists on fighting R unassisted.
X fires D.
(cue Death Rides a Horse)
FADE IN:
EXT. LOCAL DOJO - AFTERNOON
X is walking, Reservoir Dogs style (but not in slow motion)
towards the local dojo. A calm yet determined look on his
face. X adjusts his grip on his sword, which he does not
attach to his side, but insists on holding it in his hand.
He reaches the door. The sun is reflecting off of it, hiding
whatever may be going on inside. X walks right in.
END OF PART 9
PART 10
FADE IN:
Recap and D's walk into sunset.
¶ 1:36 AM
THE END
